You likely chose to work online or work from home (or you're looking to) for a certain type of lifestyle with more freedom and less stress.
Right?
Originally I didn't have big lifestyle dreams. I started working from home out of necessity. The lifestyle and the freedom just ended up being a HUGE perk. 🙂
I truly love my work - and my life.
I just returned from the Exposure & Profit Conference in Toronto where I spoke to the audience there on exactly that. I shared how I'm "always playing, always working" and how the two go hand in hand to create the ideal lifestyle - or they can. Assuming you choose the right niche and the right business model for YOU, that is. 😉
Anyway, I was meant to leave Toronto and fly to Vegas for another event - but I didn't. I changed my travel & work plans at the very last minute and decided to go to Niagara Falls instead, then head home...
Booking Toronto and Vegas events back to back like that wasn't intentional, by the way. I had a bit of a mix-up with the dates for the Collision Conference, thinking it was the 15th & 16th (not the 5-6th!) and that I had a couple weeks between events. 😛
The last month or so has been rough for me though, so that's not the only point where I dropped the ball. It happens. I still had every intention of swinging the "rush to the opposite coast" trip, and could have MADE it happen, but given I haven't been well lately... I decided it was best to change plans and take care of ME.
The great thing is... that's MY CHOICE to make.
The Collision Conference is an amazing event and it was a HUGE opportunity for me. I had a press pass, full access to the media room, and a room in the speaker's suite for easy interviews. There are around 10,000 people at the event, with practically every name in the industry represented. HUGE!
When I made the decision not to attend, and to head home instead, I did it with absolutely no regrets. I was firm in my decision and did not allow myself any second thoughts about it. I did run it by two of my closest friends (who both knew just how big an opportunity it was) expecting them to tell me I was completely nuts, but they both confirmed that it was a smart choice.
I was completely exhausted by the time I got home to Tennessee. In hindsight, working two events back to back from Tennessee to Toronto to Vegas would have totally done me in. I highly doubt I would have been at my best for what I wanted and needed to accomplish at Collision. No sweat. I'm aiming to attend their next event. 😉
Instead I had a leisurely, enjoyable trip home - and even stopped on the way to see Niagara Falls. That stop was exactly what I needed.
What a beautiful, inspiring and energizing experience!
My point, and my advice to you, is this: Live your life on your own terms. Make every decision about you, and for you & yours - only. I'm not suggesting you be "selfish" or self-absorbed, but that you make it a point to ENJOY LIFE vs always rushing and running and doing... for any other reason than because you WANT to.
Take care of YOU first, so you're in better shape to serve others.
I felt my time would be better spent resting, to follow the Collision Conference from home, do some virtual coverage - and to work on some of my other priorities.
That's the decision I made, and that's exactly what I did...
"Always working, Always playing."
The video clip of Niagara Falls above is from my low carb Facebook Page.
I mentioned earlier that I'm "always working, always playing". My life is a nice (maybe quirky) combo of the two. 🙂 I have a food & travel blog, where I basically travel & eat and talk about those experiences.
Because it's what I LOVE to do (travel and eat, lol) it makes my "work" EASY.
In my presentation in Toronto I talked about "monetizing your life", and how to create GOOD niche content quickly & easily. To give you a live example of that, er - besides the post you're reading right now (lol), I documented and/or shared my road trip and Toronto conference experience for blog & social media content.
The photo above was taken at a catered reception, sponsored by Perceptive Public Relations at the Exposure & Profit Conference. I was enjoying the event, having a great time with all the cool people there, eating great food of course - and also taking photos of those meals for blog posts & social content.
You can see a live example here.
Likewise, while getting to see Niagara Falls for the first time, I decided I'd love to host a mastermind day in that area and also scouted the area for ideal low carb meetup locations. And of course I shared my entire road trip "live" all along the way.
Was I playing or working? Both. 🙂 Always!
The "lifestyle" is POINTLESS if you're not ENJOYING life.
If you run yourself in circles trying to fit in every single opportunity or experience under the sun, you'll just exhaust yourself. You won't get to fully ENJOY anything if you're always busy planning or thinking about the next thing on your plate.
You can't possibly do it ALL, so pick and choose (carefully, wisely) what you WANT to do - on your own terms.
If that's not the point of life, I don't know what IS.
Well, that plus love and laughter. 🙂
You can chase the million dollars and mansions, the fancy cars and most exotic vacations - and that's all fine and dandy... as long as you don't miss out on the LIFE you're supposed to be living (and enjoying) in the process.
Spend some time thinking about what you WANT, about the things that make you feel HAPPY, about those things in life you ENJOY most - and do more of that.
I feel like I won the "time lottery" this week after rearranging my schedule. I'm getting some much needed rest and "me time", and also focusing on the things that matter most in my life. The things that matter the most TO ME, that is.
I love my life.
My wish for you... is that you find that same freedom. Because "freedom" is not just about having more or doing more. It's about having the choice to NOT do things if you can't or don't want to. It's about having a choice period. *cheers*
Best,
p.s. I'd love to hear how this blog post made you FEEL, or what thoughts came up while you were reading it. 🙂 Leave a comment and let's chat!
p.p.s. Interested in the Collision Conference? You can get notified of Collision 2016 details here: https://collisionconf.com/tickets. Also look on this page for other upcoming events they're hosting.
About Lynn Terry
"Playing or working? Both. 🙂 Always!" I'm trying real hard! Great post on true freedom and I hope some day to be doing exactly what you are doing Lynn!!
You bring up a good point, Dale - which may have been missed in the thoughts I shared: I *do* work hard. Or at least work SMART. But I *work*. 😉
I busted my butt to reach a point of freedom and to achieve the lifestyle I have today, and continue to work very strategically to keep that... and to also keep growing.
That's not to say I work 18 hours a day, 7 days a week. But I have. And I would. And with my weird work/fun combo that I have now... it wouldn't be a stretch to say: "If I'm awake, and thinking, I'm working." 🙂
I love your story about learning what is best for you and finding that much needed balance. May I ask what work you do out of your home?
Hi Connie 😀
I'm a professional blogger. That's sort of an obscure term I know, so I'll try to explain in as few words as possible... I blog at TravelingLowCarb.com and teach people how to eat low carb, and specifically how to stick to the low carb diet on the go and/or with a busy lifestyle.
I travel quite a bit, eat out a lot, and share low carb options that are easy to choose - and of course delicious. 🙂 I recommend products I like, and earn commission on those. I have paid advertising on my site. I get paid to blog about certain topics (sponsored). Etc. There are a variety of ways to make money if you have an audience...
I teach what I do, and how I do it, in a training series called http://www.NicheSuccessBlueprint.com which even helps you pick the ideal topic and business model for YOU through a series of exercises and helpful ideas.
If you have any questions, let me know! I've been working online for more than 18 years now. 😉 *cheers*
This post made me feel better about the fact that, at times, my business partner and I make a decision to step back and take care of ourselves and our families putting that first before the work.
In my head, I try to practice God, Family, Work but that doesn't always translate when things are on the calendar.
Thanks for reinforcing that I chose my business to support my lifestyle!
I'm really glad to hear that, Tracy! Sometimes I question what I should share, or how MUCH I should share - but the confirmation for you was good confirmation for me. 😀
Stress and pressure suck, and they take the FUN out of life. I learned all too quickly that our children grow up SO fast, and life moves more rapidly than that water over the falls... you really do have to make time to ENJOY everything around you, as often as you can, before it's gone - or changed.
I missed seeing you in Toronto, by the way. But for whatever reason you chose not to come... I'm glad you made that decision (for YOU). 🙂 *cheers*
The last year I've been so busy working 50 hours a week at my regular job, taking care of my disabled mom, working on my website and doing Amazon FBA. Then last week, I went out of town on vacation and did nothing. I was planning on hitting everything hard and getting caught up when I returned from vacation, but I still haven't done anything except go to work. I cut out all of my "extras". It feels good, I needed that and need to do nothing more often. The blog and Amazon will still be there even if I take a couple of weeks off. Reading your story about taking time off from Las Vegas makes me feel better that it's ok to rest and take time off.
Good for you, Diana! It really IS okay. 🙂 I think we have this internal drive or PUSH that makes us feel guilty for just stopping to rest, or even to just enjoy life a bit. I've made "rest" and "fun" a priority - a goal even - something to tick off my task list. That helps. 🙂 lol.
It's like in an airplane. You're instructed to put your own oxygen mask on first before putting one on your own child - or anyone else. That's because you're useless to help others if you don't take care of yourself first...
I relate!! In the past month my income plummeted, a great disappointment in terms of supporting ANY lifestyle, and especially my ideal lifestyle. While I've been scrambling to get more work, I've been taking pictures I haven't posted and writing blog posts mentally that haven't made it into print yet.
Oh, well. There's still a garden to nurture, a kitten to brush, a bird feeder to fill and walks in the spring mornings to take. I'm not giving up my "me" essentials.
So, busting my bustle will continue for awhile and regular blogging and social media posts will wait until I have paid the electricity bill. LOL
Thanks for giving yourself a ME break, Lynn, and sharing with us to affirm our need to consider it too -- without shame or blame.
Shame and Blame are tough stuff. I really just have to let it GO and live my life. Good on you for doing the same! 😉
On that note, I realized one day that nobody else really cared if I did this or that, or if I was here or there, or if I was behind on MY schedule. All the pressure, or most of it anyway, really is self-induced. So it can be self-relieved, right? 😀 I say YES!
Lynn,
Thank you for talking about this important topic. During my first 5 years as a virtual assistant, I was so driven to earn 6 figures (which I did) that I quickly burned out and was no longer enjoying my chosen career. Fortunately, I had a great coach who helped me figure out that focusing solely on money wasn't going to make me happy. Now I have a business that has a great mix of work and play -- much like you talk about in this article, Lynn. I'm focused on work that makes my life fulfilling, even when I put in a few extra hours here and there, and a business model that allows me to take time off for fun (a 2-week trip to Italy for example!) and to support my family when needed.
Knowing how much time to spend on business vs pleasure (and to make even business pleasurable) is a very individual thing, as you mention. And I also find that it's an ever changing mix. Some years I'm so excited about creating a new training/coaching program that all I want to do is work (this year!) and other years (last year) I have family activities I want to participate in so work takes up a bit less of my time. How wonderful to have the flexibility and freedom to choose!
Kathy Goughenour
Business Coach and Trainer for Virtual Assistants
expertVAtraining.com
What a great story, Kathy! Perfect example. 🙂 Personal fulfillment (happiness) is what it's all about in my book. I see so many people "chasing the dream" to the point that they're totally missing out on the life that is happening right in front of them. The journey itself should be just as awesome as the destination!
Dear Lynn:
So happy you decided to follow your heart and soul and head for home. Very sorry you lost your puppy. I take in abandoned farm animals and know how devistating the loss can be.
Loved the little clip of Niagra Falls. The amount of none-stop water rushing by is truly mind boggling. Went there as a child with my parents. It's a great memory.
Enjoy your respite.
Gini
Thank you so much, Gini. It's an interesting thing. I was REALLY looking forward to the Collision Conference. It's an amazing event, and like I said... a HUGE opportunity for me. That said, I feel great about the decision - and a huge sense of relief, even. I know it was the right path to take (home).
It's so easy to get caught up in the "got to do's" or "need to do" stuff, and push yourself entirely too hard. I did take a few minutes to weigh the details - and one thing I should have included in the original post was this:
When I made that decision, I also decided exactly what I would do *instead*. It was a "time trade" and I committed to making up for the lost opportunity with very specific replacements. And much needed rest as well, of course. 😉
I suppose my point is that it helps to KNOW your priorities, well enough to be able to weigh them out against each other. *cheers*
Hi Lynn,
I understand totally what you mean about the time lottery. At this stage I wish I could get out of my time devouring task at the moment. Took on a job that turned out to be a lot more work than I anticipated. It's weird, because I'm actually doing what I love, but the deadline stresses me out completely, and takes away most of the enjoyment. It's not even high paying. Cheap labor at its best. Unfortunately I can't get out of that one.
I'll be much more careful next time. Thanks for reminding me of the fact that life isn't only about working.
Regards
Frans.
PS. Sorry to hear things haven't been going so well lately.
Thank you, Frans. 🙂 Things are actually MUCH better now, many thanks to an enjoyable trip and wonderful friends there and along the way & back. That helped so very much. Sometimes it's all those things money *cannot* buy that make the biggest difference...
I can relate to your story, by the way. I've been in that position myself more times than I care to say. Learning from it is GREAT. When I'm in that position, in the thick of it I mean, I buckle down and focus on getting it DONE so I can get on with things I DO enjoy.
I tend to procrastinate by nature, but when I'm stressed about a deadline or NOT enjoying what I'm doing, I make it a point to just knock it out and be done with it. 😉 *cheers*
I have totally overdone for the past few weeks, trying to cover every little news item that pops up on my radar, including the big can't-miss events. Now I'm paying for it. I've been home sick for three days, and must hit the ground running again tomorrow, but I am learning to prioritize which news I must cover, and which ones I can delegate to a freelancer.
I love reporting the local news, but not when I have three and four meetings to cover in a day. (and then WRITE the articles.). Not enough of me to go around lately. I've decided my health is more important. Now if I can just remember that I have decided that!
I'm known for doing what I say I will do. Maybe I should just start saying: Sorry, I can't, but send me a photo.
Hi Mam! 🙂 Now sounds like a great time to evaluate your business model, your schedule, and your priorities. Is there anything you can outsource, or out-task at least?
I have a rule in my own business which is: "do more of what's working, and less of what's not." It sounds simple, and it is actually. I evaluate what I'm doing that is bringing the most results (that old 80/20 rule).
I also look at what takes the LEAST time but has the BEST results - and tend to lean toward those things as much as I can.
Feel better, and take care of YOU. 😉 *cheers*
Good choice, Lynn. Take care of yourself.
And I still have good memories of drinking iced coffee with you here in Colorado Springs a couple of years back. Good to see you haven't forgotten how to relax!
Ohh - those iced coffees were fabulous! Especially with that amazing view. 🙂 I spent way more time on the patio enjoying TIME than I did at the actual event I think, lol. Good times!! That... is what life is all about. *cheers*
Thanks for another great post 🙂 I'm glad to get "permission" from someone as successful as you to take a break once in a while!
Last week was a bit crazy for me and I had very little downtime to rest until this afternoon. At first I thought how great it was to have a big block of time to write, but instead I decided to blow it off to just sit down and do nothing for an hour. I'll get some writing done another time 🙂
By the way, the video of the falls is awesome! I've never been there before...hoping to one day...but I've never seen a video of them that close-up before!
It was shocking how close I was - and how risky some people were being, considering how easy it would be to tip over and get swept down! 😛 Ack! lol... It was my first time seeing it too. I was surprised to learn it is man made, not natural. We're already planning to go back again soon though, this time for a 3 day weekend. 😉 There is SO much to do & see there!!
On doing nothing - good for you! One of my favorite things to do when I just want to unplug and unwind is to watch the History channel (H2). It's becoming a daily ritual actually, one I really look forward to and enjoy. 🙂 *cheers*
Sure, you were only a few hours from me and this time I'd have willingly come to meet you in person! lol
I know what you mean about the difference between getting that money and deciding you need some time for yourself. It can be risky; I certainly know that. But when you need your break you've just got to take it and relish it.
Wow Mitch! Where are you based?? I love meeting up with anyone I can along the way, during my travels! 🙂
True, it's all about balance - and ultimately: Quality of Life.
As I mentioned in another comment, knowing I was giving up a huge opportunity to come home instead... I committed to using that "gained time" on profitable projects. Basically as a means of justifying the decision, which works for me. 😉
I live in the Syracuse area but Niagara Falls is a trip I make often enough so that it feels like a relatively short jaunt at this point.
Ah, now I know! 🙂 We were trekking home that day (18 hours on the road) but next time we're planning a 3-day weekend at Niagara Falls, so let's definitely make it a point to meet up when that happens!!
Way to listen to your gut instinct and take some time for yourself. After all, isn't freedom why you built the business you built?
As you know, I recently rejoined Clicknewz and decided to pursue my passion. I've dabbled for way to long and stuck with 'what I know' and put off 'what I really want' to do.
Why do we stay in our 'comfort zones' when they are so uncomfortable.
I'm currently working in a business as a partner, but it's misery because I knew going in it wasn't the right fit... (kinda like marrying someone & thinking they're going to change), but the potential to grow and make good money was there and still is. Plus we've quadrupled the size of the company. So, I've put myself between a rock and a hard place, and even though we're still growing, I'm just trying to figure out and plan an exit strategy.
Money will never trump passion, in my opinion. And you always preach, rightfully so... CHOOSE SOMETHING YOUR PASSIONATE ABOUT.
So now, I have to keep the brick and mortar business going, but at the same time work on building my online business so I can get out. When I'm not doing anything, I feel like I should be, so I'm not TRULY relaxing. And when I'm working, which is pretty much ALL THE TIME... I'm wishing I had a business that gave me some freedom and allowed for some downtime.
That's why I joined your community. You really do offer a complete package. And this post really resonated with me.
FOLLOW YOUR PASSION!!!
Thank you, Dana - I'm really glad you joined us! It's such a great fit for where you are in your life & business right now. 🙂
You said, "Why do we stay in our 'comfort zones' when they are so uncomfortable." Good question. The answer is because... it's comfortable, even being UNcomfortable is a comfort zone for most people.
There are a lot of things at play there: Fear of failure, fear of success, and just the fact that complacency is a hard place to launch from. It can be really hard to find motivation (the kind that can really change your life) when there's food on the table and the electric bill is paid. Routine is comfortable. Habits are comfortable. Even when the routine or the habits are not ideal.
Breaking out, pushing past, forcing change - those are all difficult and challenging. It takes a SERIOUS amount of "want to" to accept that challenge... and see it through. 😉
Thanks for a great timely post Lynn! The past three months have been really stressful in our family with my husban being very ill. We never quite knew if we would actually get to take our holiday we had booked to Phuket for these two weeks. Thankfully, after some great treatment we get to be on holidays. Originally I had plans to keep up with several pieces of work/blogging/audios and other things, but now that we are here by the pool for the first time, relaxing, I feel it it's more important for us to relish in gratitude and take time to self heal for us both. I had given myself permission to do this, and reading your post now confirms my decision as being correct. All the work will be there when we get home and I'll be more energized to move forward by taking a real break.
I'm glad to hear that Fay. 🙂 Those are memories in the making, that are far more valuable than any amount of work you do or money you make!
Giving yourself permission to just BE, or to ENJOY life and step away from the crazy task list of life... is a beautiful thing. Like I mentioned in my post, you really have to be firm in those decisions (no regrets!) and be fully present in the moment you choose.
Being "fully present" is a tough thing to do, by the way. It takes practice, but it's such an awesome thing! It seems we're wired to always be looking ahead or looking behind, and totally miss what's right in front of us. Those moments where we live IN the moment we're in... are the best bits of life. 😉
ENJOY your holiday!! *cheers*
Very good to see that you are not only human after all Lynn, but doing what you need to do, and at your own pace.
We are each and every one of us at the level of success and 'world domination' that we choose to be.
Even when we work 18+ hours a day, and feel we are owed so much more than we are getting ... we are still only doing what we CHOOSE to do.
I am a YUPPIE from the 80's and I loved the play hard/work hard lifestyle, travel, glamour of it all, but it is an insanely driven life to maintain.
Totally exhausting... and for what? *Hint* There is so much more to crafting a wonder-filled life, and it doesn't need much money.
So although I still have a totally unrealistic work mindset, I have learned to LISTEN to my body, and my spirit, and now do what I WANT to do, when I want to do it, and only to the level I want to do it.
Lots less money than 10 years ago when I retired from my business and first started working like a demon in IM, because in recent years I stopped complaining about drops in IM $ growth, and feeling like a failure because I couldn't multi-task my way around a dozen different income streams, and instead sold all my niche sites, deleted my insane To-Do lists, and reconsidered my Goals.
Refused to be 'guilted' into feeling obliged to always "just do more" ... or "try this shiny new object" for instant success, or expected to be training others 24/7 for free (and doing most of their job) simply because what I did worked and I was 'obliged' to help others, even those who won't get out of their own way.
So now I'm much happier 'doing it my way', and can still crank it up a level or two when ever the time comes that I see a project that I want to put more effort into. Its my choice.
Living life on my terms. And putting my ego in my back pocket helped.
I'm glad that I finally admitted that I'm just not prepared to do what it takes to be what other people think a "big success" is in IM ... and... and ... I'm still alive and shit!!! Whodathunkit?
And eternally grateful that my earlier hard work has enabled me to be able to make these choices. Wish everyone had that same luxury.
"putting my ego in my back pocket helped" <- I loved that. 🙂 What a great saying! You bring up so many great points about the pressures, both internal and external, to "succeed" - and what that means exactly. While in Toronto I had an interesting conversation with a friend of mine there, regarding levels of success, and my own experience with it. It's not uncommon for me to say "I miss my simple life" (referring to a time back when things were easier to manage). At a certain point I realized what I did NOT want to do, and why - because it was too much stress, too much work, and way to high maintenance for me personally (lol). And that's a good thing. It's good to know what you don't want, as much as it's good to know what you DO want. I talked to her about how simple, easy and GOOD my life was - and how I managed to enjoy a great lifestyle at even a $36k annual income. Mainly because back at that time in my life, I lived a very simple lifestyle with very low cost of living and low overhead - and still managed to travel and enjoy life with no financial stress (and no major tax bills, or huge "corporation to run" etc). I do still miss those days sometimes. 🙂 The "million dollar lifestyle" is not for everyone. People need to be encouraged about that, TOO. So many people are "selling the dream" - when that dream is not for everyone. Especially if it doesn't FIT you, or fit what you want out of life or YOUR ideal lifestyle. There is no THE ideal lifestyle, only YOUR ideal lifestyle. I say we each figure out exactly what that is for us personally... and go out and achieve it. Shut down the internal and external pressure, and go for what you REALLY want. 😉 *cheers*
I wanna be like Lynn, except I like to go on vacation and turn it all off!
Did back-to-back events last spring and vowed I wouldn't get sucked in this year, especially since I want to get a product launched.
Do take an extra day of two in the local area when I go to an event to enjoy myself tho. I always feel sorry for the folks who check out on the last day and rush off at the closing; sooo stressful. Tried the working cruise too, yuck!
Even if the event is part of your biz instead of being there as an attendee, they take a lot of energy - even for extroverts!
So, take care of yourself - you're important to so many folks (in-person and virtually) - we'd be lost without your guiding light!
Leah
That made me smile, Leah. 🙂
Sometimes I do "unplugged" trips - but it's rare. I actually LIKE being connected! But even when I'm unplugged, I tend to take photos and notes for later, lol. There's something about being unplugged that gives me a CHARGE and the creative ideas flow. 🙂
Very timely, indeed, as I've been doing A LOT of self-reflection personally and professionally the last several months (actually the last year or two, truth be known). For a long time, I thought I was living life on my terms, but what I discovered is that it was easier to trick myself into thinking I was. Mom, wife, daughter, biz owner, dog owner, etc. etc. etc., I had so many labels, that it's really only now I'm discovering me, just for me, and making those changes only for me. Is that selfish? You bet! And I'm excited about it because for the first time in my online career, heck in my entire adult life, I'm actually moving forward just for me. Thank you for posting this!
You're so right that it's easy to "trick yourself into thinking you are", Patty! I'm so glad you're excited about life, business... and YOU. 🙂 That's awesome!! *cheers*
I learned the hard way how insidious stress can be - I lost my health (and pretty much everything else) because of it. Now it is much easier to choose "less stress" over "more money"! In fact, even when it comes to the minor things in life, I'll take action to reduce my stress. For example, cancelling appts if I'm not feeling great, calling to let someone know I'm running late so I don't stress about it on the way, saying no when in the past I'd say yes, doing things because I want to instead of because I should, etc, etc. I would have made the same decision as you to cut your trip short, Lynn - good choice! Besides, who wouldn't want to stay in Canada a bit longer if they could, eh? 😉
Exactly! What a lovely place. 🙂 That was my first time in Toronto, or on the East side of Canada. Of course, I love Vancouver & Victoria too!!
I used to do all those same things. Learning to say No was a big one for me - but oh so important. It makes a huge difference when you truly are living life on your own terms. And you know what? No one (that matters) seems to mind those things at all. In fact, they totally understand and usually agree! 😉